Job search

Here is a list of Jobs I have applied for, they are all for the state. The only one that I really don't want is the Information Technology one - it is the title I had before with the state and the job is down town so I would be driving about an hour, no good!
Each of the other jobs I would love to have! Now all I need to do is get one. I have been marking an answer wrong on the forms except for the VA counselor one - I actually called the state to see what I should mark (about re-employment with the state). One of the HR jobs is at a corrections center in the next town over so that would be great for traffic, the other HR job I REALLY want is with the fire and Police - really want that one! The Admin Program Specialist is with Department of correction which would be pretty cool also. Then the VA Counselor would rock since I have already used so of the programs and I could learn about more that are available! I would love to help other Veterans get as much help as possible. That one is only filled by veterans so that helps me our even more!

Veterans Assistance Counselor 1
Administrative Program Specialist A
HUMAN RESOURCES ANALYST A
INFORMATION TECHNOLOGY TELECOMMUNICATIONS TECHNICAL ANALYST 1
HUMAN RESOURCES CONSULTANT A

I also turned in my resume to some of the industrial offices today, none had jobs posted but it can't hurt to have them on file!

Now the waiting game begins! Give me a chance, I am a really hard worker!!

Say a special prayer today for Sarah, her surgery is tomorrow, I pray for her, Jerry and Amanda and the team working on her!!

workout

Today at the gym my trainer Carole told me that some guy stopped her the other day in the parking lot to tell her he noticed how much I have changed since I have been working out and he was impressed. Then today as I was leaving a lady stopped me to say pretty much the same thing! So my day was made by two strangers. It really means a lot to see that people notice the hard work I am doing! So it makes me sad to think once I find a job I have to stop this program. I just can't see bringing the kids to the play room at the gym after being in aftercare. I decided that I would start writing down my workout each day and that way I should have a good list once I find a job so I can continue at home. I would only need to get a few kettle bells to continue since we have the TRX system I can use that for the banded loops and I have a ball the only other thing I don't have is the plyo box but I can get a step for that. It makes me happy that I have figured out a way to continue something that I love - ok I only love it after the workout is complete! during it I wish I could go back to my nonworkout workouts! Yeah ME!

First day

Today jax started 2nd grade! I am so excited for him. I hope he continues to be happy with his teacher I have not heard too many great things about her so I am keeping my fingers crossed she can handle him and not rush to label him as the talker that he is!!



While jax was at school Katie had fun in the tub



Being bubble girl!

Katie's room

Yes this is what her room looks like after she Plays with friends! They sure can make a mess!




I applied for a job today doing HR for the police and fire for the state - I would LOVE this job so say a prayer for me. I do realize my application may be rejected because I do not have a current test score but civil service said it was up to each department and since I am a former state worker it could go in either direction but the job closes tomorrow so I had to try! Most prepare myself for the changes as sad as this all may be! I thank all of you!

It was a bust

We went to the balloons last night and there was a thunder storm rolled in and shut everything down! at least we got to see a few balloons inflate and the kids got a few cards but that was it. No fireworks for us :( better luck next year!
Oh the happy side hallie and the kids came back to our house and played for a while before heading back home! We will see the tomorrow for cousins weekend!!

Choices

I have to make a choice about Disney in November, I want to go and take the kids but I really do not know if I can handle both kids alone. I know the whole family is going to be there but I realistically can't expect someone else to help me. I know everyone says they will but that is not fair to them and their family. So I can cancel and plan something that Erik will go to (maybe if work is not too busy) or I go to Disney alone.
I have a while to decided but this is what is on my mind right now - maybe I am trying not to think about other things so I am focused on something trivial. The kids don't listen at home so I think I am crazy to try Disney alone.

Yeah life!

Lego fun!

The kids were punished today for fighting with each other so I pulled out the legos from 2 Christmas ago and they spend all day working together and playing alone with their legos
Katie had here princess ballroom


While jaxon build a jeep - took him all day

School is almost here

Today I worked at the school giving out school supplies and putting together the home and school packets. One more week till the kids to back to school :(
Even with everything going on I think the kids had a good summer. We spent a lot of time with neighborhood friends and family. We still have some fun left - balloons on Friday, cousins weekend sat and Sunday. Plus I plan on going to jump and jive and the best (not) chuck e cheese!

A little too late

Here is the ring Erik gave me back in April. He had bought me the diamond around our 10year anniversary. I did not know how I wanted it set so it sat in my jewelry box till I felt we had the money to go and get the diamond set. We found this setting, he loved it so we set the diamond. I was so excited, I love this ring, I love that I was able to set the diamond in something that would show it off.
I did not show off the ring when I got it, I did not post it on Facebook and I did not post it on this blog and I did not run around bragging about it - that is not me. I should have because that is what he wanted me to do, he did not tell me this but I should have known. Instead my silence was taken to mean I did not care, I did not love the ring, I did not appreciate what was done for me. I still wear the ring and will continue to wear the ring. I don't know how to take it off. I still have faith and hope that time will heal.



I ask my self why am I posting some of this stuff on my blog - hopefully it can save someone else. I don't know what to do this is something I never wanted to learn about much less actually live through.
Just some crazy rants

How

It is funny people keep saying - wow you are holding up so well - How am I suppose to act? I have 2 kids that have asked me to stop crying. I have 2 kids that need a strong mom. I have 2 kids that love me very much and I can not fail them. I do not know how I am suppose to act - I am not going to crawl up in a ball and waste my time being sad. Am I sad - yes I am devastated, I am mad, I am crushed, but I am hopeful and I have faith. Maybe reality has not set in. Maybe I have too much faith and hope. But that is how I make it through the day. I have to be strong to answer all of jaxon's questions. I have to be strong so they know it is not them. I have to find strength I never needed before. I have my moments. Just because it is not in front of people does not mean I am not hurting, crushed, and devastated. I have to make everything is "normal" for the kids. You really can't judge someone else and their ability to be strong because until you are placed in their shoes you have no idea how to act or how you will react. I am trying to fix myself. I am trying to be strong. So how am I holding up so well 2 names - jaxon and Katie!


Yeah life!

Up and down

So today was full of a lot of ups and downs! Now that more people know what is going on I am seeing how many people love me and want to help me! I truly am blessed. My parents were super supportive! My sister-in-laws are there for me and my friends are checking on me to make sure I am making it through the day. Both my brothers are full of advise, support, and love! I am finding out that I even have a support system at the gym with people I have only known a few months! I can not express how much all of you mean to me. This is going to be hard no matter how it turns out and I can not thank you enough.
At first I was embarrassed - how could this happen to me but I am learning that life happens and we pay for our mistakes and missteps. The more I learn the more I truly believe this was unavoidable. Now I have to be strong and hold my head high and move on. I need to better myself for my sake and the sake of our children. I need to be strong and make the right choices and not make any rash decisions. I need to figure out the next step and not be afraid to make and I need to be strong

Thank you all for being here for me!!


Yeah life!

Back to the blog

So I got on trouble with Megan for not keeping up with my blog so here I go
The kids and I are in Texas right now. We came for Izaac's 8th birthday party. The kids live to skate so they had a blast!
The kids also love the animals here...


The chickens



And the praying mantas



They flew around the house and were very fun to play with especially the one that landed on my face!

Location:Barcelona Dr,Friendswood,United States

Wedding

Today my brother-in-law Kirk got married and we had to dress up. It was not as bad as I imaged it to be. Very small wedding but very nice.


This picture was from the reversal last night, very nice place to have the wedding!


Picking out Katie's dress was pretty hard but she finally picked this blue one



This is Kirk

a little disappointed??

So today it has been 2 weeks since I measured and I was a little disappointed that I had not lost anything in my hips and chest but I did lose 1/2 inch in the thigh, arm and belly. My trainer Carole and Erik both said that was really good so I guess I should be happy but I only lost 3.5 lbs in 2 weeks - once again that is not bad and is a good weight loss especially after a really bad eating weekend.
Things I have learned -
1 - Alcohol is not my friend any more. (was it ever??) but it really does play a big part in my weight.
2 - I have learned to like exercise and push myself more then I have before (like not lowering weights when I am tired)
3 - I don't want to eat bad so I ruin all my hard work

I think I am ready to start the big group class. I will try one next week and see how it goes!

Mother 's day

I had a great Mother's day. The kids kept fighting to a minimal and Erik spoiled me! He made the breakfast I asked for and the ribs I loved and even humored me with a snowball dinner!
Plus he took Jaxon to get my pandora bracelet!



Yeah life!

still going strong

I am still going strong after 3 weeks of Art of Strength. I am getting stronger and able to do more and it is actually exciting ! When I first started I could not put my feet in the ropes and do knee bends - in a push up position but with your feet in rope rings and then pull your knees in, today I was able to do 3 set - 12, 9, 11. I was so excited and my trainer was excited that I am getting stronger which helps with motivation!
I did box jumps - and even fell but I got right back up and continued while laughing. I am very lucky that the gym is pretty empty when I am there.
I never thought I would look forward to working out and going to the gym! I am very happy that I found this program and that it was affordable! I am even ok with the fact that I am not getting results yesterday! I am feeling better and excited to see what changes are going to happen over the next few months.


I am so excited about Bin Laden! Last night I went through a bunch emotions. It better not affect Erik coming home on Thursday! Thank goodness Qatar is a pretty neutral and safe place. I will be able to breath once he is out of the middle east and back on US soil!

Sarah has a hard life!!


MaMere and pawpaw have a blue pool!

Location:Spring break fun!

Trial run

Completed my first week of Art of Strength training - wow did nit realize how little I actually worked out before and the crazy thing is I love it. Now while I am doing it I don't like it but I power through. Some things I have learned

I may be right handed but my left Leg is stronger then the right. My theory is - my back - I still have lots of pain mostly on my right side and mostly in my right leg. I take aleve every night just to sleep through the pain. So I think I babied that side and over the years have made it significantly weaker. They say this training will help that.
The next thing I learned is that Erik was right (yes I said it, Erik was right) I really have not been working out enough or doing enough. Now I am not seeing physical changes yet but I do feel better overall and now I drip sweat ( gross). Sweat is perfume of the fit ....
I am actually enjoying working out - after the fact that is. While I am being tortured I am not feeling the love. But afterwards I really realize I am enjoying this program. And I am disappointed that I will miss this Friday and Monday. Then 2 weeks straight in May/June and another week in June! I am trying to figure out what I can do so I do not go back to ground zero with the soreness. The colorado I will bring the TRX with me ( who is this person that wants to exercise?)
I even started tracking my food again today because I realized it was pointless to workout and then eat bad and I need to make sure I am eating enough!
Now if I could only get some more sleep tonight. Woke up at 3:00 and have been up since it is now 5, I have been doing laundry :(


Yeah life!

Earth Day

We went to Earth Day today and had a great time!
There was painting and drawing and lots of crafts for the kids to do!
Great fun day!!

Katie's Tangled cake

This was a fun and easy cake to make! I was very happy with the way it turned out and Katie LOVED it!!